From the recording It's Christmas Time

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The 9/11 cowardly terrorist attacks had a really big impact on me.  I was pretty numb for a long time - unable to process the why, or all that happened or all that had & will change, maybe forever. I didn't know anyone killed or impacted but I mourned all of it anyway, on my own.  Horrible things happen but one stumbles along.

 
I was in a shopping mall months later (still in a state of misery) & suddenly realized …  “oh, it must be Christmas”.  Now, many years later, I’d say this song is about my Mom dying, me missing her, but stumbling along as we all do.
 
I thought maybe this tune was too sad for publication but ...

Lyrics

CHRISTMAS TIME     © 2018 Alan P. MacLeod     4:28 @ 152 bpm, 6/8
  
I know, from the lights down town
it’s Christmas time, it must be Christmas time.
Bright decorations, all around
so it’s Christmas time, Christmas time.
But this year it’s hard for me
I ache for the way, it used to be
And I’m scared.
Will I make it through
Can I even have Christmas, with, out, you  
With out you.
 
Oh silent night
Oh Holy night
I’ll be all right
‘Cuz you taught me, it's Christmas time
Christmas time deep in our hearts
Fa la la lala la la.  It’s Christmas time
 
I know, from the Northern Star
it’s Christmas time, Christmas time.
So many friends, are traveling far
‘cuz it’s Christmas time, it’s Christmas time.
So I, unpack the delicate things
Remembering, the stories you’d bring
And I smile, what else can I do 
But try to have Christmas, just, for, you  
In honour of you.
 
CHORUS
 
I am done, with all my false starts
I’m gonna' string up some lights.  Gonna' brighten the dark
& I’ll be strong.  Strong as my memory of you.
And I will have Christmas, for me, and you
For me and for you too
 
Oh silent night
Oh Holy night
I’ll be all right
‘Cuz you taught me, it's Christmas time
You taught me
It's Christmas time deep in our hearts
So fa la la lala la!